During the past weekend, I have attended an old friend’s funeral.
Its quite different from those funerals I had attended during my life. The funeral was conducted in a way normal Christian would have when they passed away. But it differed as its the saddest funeral I have attended so far. It also was inspiring to me as it reminded me of my older days and that I should prepare for my own funeral.
My friend died young, only at her golden year of 38. For the nearly 20 years that we have known each other, she always was the understanding and caring person. She’s not those kind of person that likes being loud and attention-seeking, but I am sure everyone won’t forget her.
I forgot how we met, whether we have been working at the same company or just because we worked in the same industry. We talked to each other irregularly, sharing friendly conversation and thoughts on our works. Then, she flied overseas to further studies before changing industry when back home. Then, was almost the same time she told me she was diagnosed breast cancer.
I never thought breast cancer could kill, as few people around me diagnosed same disease and got cured. But that happened differently on her. On and off, during our not frequent meetings, she told me it returned and had impacts on her health. She has been doing lots of exercises, cutting workload to reasonable level and maintained regular hours work times. She even changed to a part-timer despite she loved her work so much.
However, the illness has last year made her cut off from work completely when it became more severe. I was so careless then that I thought she’s strong enough and would once again fight a winning battle as what she had done a decade ago. I was wrong, and I lost the last chance to talk to her and telling her how I found her friendship heartwarming.
Her great personality and strong will to fight against sickness in order to fulfill her life was so impressing and that’s why we all were weeping, crying with reddened noses and swallen eyes at the funeral.
I never found any funeral that attendees were so uncontrollably sad and weeping was so audible. She was certainly missed by us for leaving us so soon. But her life attitude and love for all certainly will live within us for long long time.
I was engaged in reflecting how my encounters with her in the past and how I have changed. I believe I acted the most normal and older me when I was with her than with other people cause then I was the older self that was less skeptical and have more faith in people. Actually why and how I had changed? That, is what I need to found out and search for the better me from now and onwards.
Her funeral also reminded me I better prepare for my own funeral and notify necessary person who could help me to arrange a simple services that would do good to my family, relatives and friends.
Life never was a well-planned journey but we need to prepare ahead so it could be not forgotten and has its meaningful impact. My friend demonstrated me.